La la la, mafeesh!

Here’s my theory on the taxi situation in Cairo: the city owns all the taxis in the city and any citizen of Cairo is welcome to hop in an empty one and start charging people for rides. I can’t think of any other reason for so many taxi drivers to have no idea where anything is.

Yesterday, my roommates had a cabbie that had not heard of Virgin Mega Store, and then our friends got a cab that didn’t know where the Opera House was. But let’s take Friday as my example. I’d heard about a store with vinyl records somewhere in Mohandiseen, an area known for some good shopping districts for tourists and otherwise, especially along Mossadeq St. The only directions I found to this store, however, were, “Go to Mossadeq. Turn right at Hardee’s. Then take the first left and go until you find it.” As you might imagine, instructions like this are basically worthless in Cairo, but I was up for the adventure. Let’s see how it turned out…

(with cabbie in Arabic):
“Mohandiseen?”
“Sure. Where?”
“Mossadeq Street.”
“What?
“Mossadeq”
“No no, there is no Mossadeq in Mohandiseen.”
“Yes there is. Go to Doqi Street.”
“Then it’s in Doqi?”
“Sure.” (which is only a few blocks south of Mossadeq)
…
“This is Doqi Street.”
“Ok here is fine.”
“You want Doqi Square or Doqi Street?”
“Doqi street.”
“unintelligible muttering and pointing…”
“Is this Doqi Street??”
“Yes.”
“Then here is fine. ::getting out:: How much?”
(Unfortunately at this point he sees me pull a 10 from my pocket, and this ride should’ve cost around 5 or 6.)
“10 pounds.”
“No, I want change.”
“No, ten is good.”
“Fine. Whatever.”

After a half hour of walking up Doqi St. with which Mossadeq intersects, I noticed the street signs have changed and I’m no longer on Doqi St. Effectively giving up on finding the store, I figured I’d just keep exploring because I hadn’t been to that part of town yet. So I walk, and walk, and walk, and by some juice, and walk… eventually I miraculously find one of those big maps at a major intersection. Needless to say, I’d missed Mossadeq and walked about two miles in the wrong direction. After a good look at the map, however, I was back on my way. Found Mossadeq. Found Hardee’s. Took the first turn. Took the second. Walked two blocks and saw it, “Better Music” (in English).

Despite the name, the place turned out to be a little DVD rental shop, with one rack of CDs and a shelf of cassettes. The owner did not understand the words “vinyl” or “record”. As he was showing me some CDs of American rock bands I’d never heard of before, I noticed a clear plastic bag on the top shelf full of vinyl.

“Those!”
“ahhhh. Turntable?”
“Yes yes!”
“Oook, ::getting them out to show me one by one:: Joon Deenver?
“No.”
“Ehhh, Toom Joonz?”
“No.”
“Ahhh, Batsy Cline?”
“No.”
“ehhh, Neil Diomoond?”
“…Do you know where else I can buy turntable music in Cairo?”
“No. Virgin Mega Store? but no turntable there.”
“Nowhere else?”
“No.”
“Ok, you obviously have no idea what you’re talking about” “Thank you, good bye.”

Luckily my ride back home redeemed taxi drivers for the moment being.

“Tahrir Square?”
“Yes.” ..."Where in Tahrir?"
"Kasr el-Ainy."
"That is one way. Where on Kasr el-Ainy?"
"Right up here's fine."
"No no, where are you going? I'll get you closer."
"Alright, Hussein Hegazy Street, by the Co-Op gas station."
"Ok, right here."
“How much?”
“Oh, whatever. No problem. Five or six.”
(I gave him six.)